Photo credits: Silvia Aleksandrova Aleksieva – Tango Photographer
“Do you know why tango is a magnifying glass?”
Dimitris
40 icons of tango, judges of the world tango championship, world champions, and experienced maestros came together to create one remarkable book.
“What do you want to magnify?”
I stopped for a second.
Where did that question come from?
And why was she asking me that?
And… in the middle of a tanda?
I shook my head, and whispered:
-Let me answer that after this song.
We hugged again.
Usually, my mind becomes quiet when I dance.
I love silence in tango, both inside and outside.
But that question fired up my thoughts.
I went through the discussion we had before that question.
She was telling me a story:
“A long time ago I was sitting in a milonga in Buenos Aires.
I was trying to dance with a milonguero on the other side of the room.
But he kept rejecting my mirada (I only ask using the cabeceo).
After a long, long, loooong time we “exchanged” the cabeceo and we danced.
I asked him “why didn’t you ask me before?”
He replied “the music wasn’t right for our dance”.
Somehow this special man knew what would work for us to dance together and what wouldn’t.
I am grateful for that experience, both the dance, and the lesson.
It was an important message I have never forgotten.”
When she told me that story, I was in awe of the subtlety of this man’s way of thinking.
And how this considering and caring part of his character came to life through tango.
I couldn’t help but think that tango works as a big magnifying glass of what we have inside us.
If you have a bit of ego in you, and then you become good in tango, your ego becomes huge.
If you are a humble person, and then you become good in tango, you find more reasons to stay humble.
Pride, low self esteem, good energy, jealousy, caring or whatever else;
put it in tango, and it magnifies.
I discussed with her that idea, and her response was beautiful:
“I know what you mean.
Do you know why tango is a magnifying glass?”
I wasn’t sure how to put it into words.
She saved me:
“Tango materializes thoughts and behaviours.
Things that are normally inside our heads, become physical reality through tango.
Let me explain what I mean.
You can see people with big egos from far away:
They never dance with someone that doesn’t dance well.
Their ego materializes in actions.
I am sure you have seen many times dancers accidentally hitting each other.
Imagine a situation where it was obviously one leader’s fault;
A leader that is in general dancing respectfully.
Look at the face of the other three people for their reactions.
You can learn a lot.
Do they react with kindness, a smile, forgiveness, understanding?
Or with anger and negativity?
Tango materializes their thoughts and character;
Their state of mind becomes visible.
It is very easy to understand yourself, watching how you behave in tango.
I once danced with a great leader who had a… unique practice.
After dancing a tanda with an amazing dancer, above his technique limits, he danced with someone that had a technique level way below.
He told me:
“I received a gift, but a gift that I am not supposed to keep, a gift I am supposed to deliver to another person.
How much more happiness does a gift bring when it doesn’t stay in the hands of only one person?”
I asked him why does he do that.
“I am using tango to develop myself.
I want to create a character who is more giving, with an abundance mindset.
By setting as a goal to always give back everything good I receive in tango, I am magnifying my capacity and habit of giving”.”
The music ended.
I was lost in my thoughts during the whole song.
I looked at her.
She smiled, knowingly.
“I understand you were away during the song.
I promise you did the same ocho, ocho, media luna sequence at least 10 times.”
I smiled.
Yes, that’s what I do when my mind goes away.
It’s my go-to sequence when my mind is away.
“It’s OK.
It was my fault, I asked you a question.
I took you off your body, and into your mind.
But now you have to answer me Dimitris.
The end of the year is coming.
What do you want to magnify using tango this year?
What are your New Year’s Eve tango goals when it comes to who you want to become?
Once again:
What do YOU want to magnify?”
-Healing, I said. I want to be able to heal and receive healing through my dance.
“Then that’s your tango goal for 2020.
Everytime you dance, have that intention.
Everytime you enter in a milonga, have that intention.
Everytime someone steps on you with her heal…
Have that intention.”
What do YOU want to magnify this year? Using tango as your tool, what do YOU want to bring more into your life and the life of others in 2020? Read what others decided and leave your opinion in the comments below. And, if you liked it, don’t forget to share!
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Dimitris Bronowski
TangoArgentinoFestivals.com
I loved the idea of tango as a tool to change ourselves. My New Year’s tango resolution (and intention) is to allow me to stay relaxed even when I don’t control what’s happening. I feel it will bring me a lot more calmness if I am able to do that. And it will make also the people around me calmer. I will keep that intention in my mind everytime I dance, and every time I am simply sitting because noone wanted to dance with me that tanda. Thank you for that beautiful thought!
Thank you Maria! The ability of being relaxed even when you don’t control the situation is definitely a powerful tool for a happier life! Go for it!
I would like the people around me to be happier. That makes me happier. I think my New Year’s Resolution would be to smile more when I dance, and when I do mistakes, and when I misunderstand something. A smile goes a long way, and since we are so close in tango, I think a smile means even more
Tango brings us closer Diana, and our smiles look indeed bigger. That’s a great intention to have every time you enter a milonga!
Tango has saved my life. It brought me the people I love most in my life. I couldn’t be happier I met this dance. I think many women come to tango and they leave dissapointed when they don’t dance. I would like to see on their faces the happiness that tango can bring. My resolution is to “Use tango to bring more happiness in others, leaders and followers”
Resolutions that focus on creating a better tango life for others are powerful Jeremy! How would a milonga look like if more people had that in mind when entering a milonga?
Such a nice post. It`s really something we must think about. Tango is more about giving than receiving, so we really must be very careful what we magnify with our dance.
Thank you Aliona! I wonder though, what is your New Year’s Tango Resolution? What do you want to magnify this year using your tango?
Yes, I actually didn’t answer. That’s because I was still thinking about it. I always thought that tango magnifies the emotional state of a dancer. If you’re happy, you will share your happiness through your dance; if you’re furious you’ll share this feeling with your partner. So I always try to not dance if I don’t have a proper mood for it. But the more I take your post into account, I understand that this is only a simplistic way to think about it. We can do more if we try to give something with purpose. I want to magnify confidence this year. I want to help people to allow themselves to believe that they can be happy.
Thank you for sharing that Aliona! Tango trully magnifies our emotional states. That’s why I find it so important that we are aware of the emotional state that we are in when we enter a milonga. And it quite powerful if we make it a habit to set a clear intention at the beginning of the night focusing on creating a desired reality. When I enter a milonga, and I (for example) make it my intention to create more smiles and make people I dance with feel light and relaxed, the night becomes fun and relaxed. Not by magic. Simply because setting an intention makes us identify easier opportunities for that intention to be materialized. Thank you for trying to create confidence in you and in others Aliona!
Thank you for this post, I have found it both interesting and also moving.
My intention for 2020 is to magnify inner stillness, to enter each dance and milonga consciously magnifying that within myself.
Thanks for sharing that Madeline! I love the clarity of your intention!
Yes, yes and yes. Thank you for this beautiful article! I want to copy Madelines idea, because I have been working on my inner stillness a lot during the last months and I love the idea of consciously taking it to tango as well. It will probably even help me to smile more, stay calm and have even more ‘inner space’ to listen to the music deeply.
But also I want to dare more often to ask followers to dance – and I think I will need a lot of patience and gratitude towards myself for this because it’s really not easy for me 🙂